Skip to main content

Yo-Yo

I feel like a yo-yo, I've decided. One minute (or day), I'm up..the next I'm down. Then I bounce back up, only to be catapulted back down again.

Last weekend, and most of last week, were so great!! I felt amazing and had such a good time with my family. Reagan had her first solo visit with my parents in Sacramento, which she absolutely loved. And we had a nice visit on Sunday when we went to pick her up.




 Saturday was spent visiting a very good high school friend, Holly, who has been one of my biggest cheerleaders these past few months. Her texts, gifts, and now visit have made me relish in the beauty of life and friendships. And, I must say I'm now totally in love with her son, Michael, and hope that he and Charlie do in fact get married some day. They seem to be well on their way with her stripping down to her diaper for him, and him rubbing her belly and saying "belly" repeatedly.

But then my bliss came to a crashing halt yesterday during Round 3. In one regards it was the best infusion yet. They gave me an  IV drip of Benadryl this time since I started having a bit of a reaction to the Red Devil last round. The Benadryl worked insanely fast and I was fast asleep before the Red Devil was even injected. Sleeping through an infusion is definitely the way to go, I've decided. We got home at 4:30 where I promptly fell asleep on the lazy boy (and I don't mean Matt!). Matt did wake me up for a quick dinner around 6:30 and then put me straight to bed. I slept through until 8 am today. That's an insane amount of sleep for me. So I don't know why I feel so completely exhausted today. I have done nothing all day, except take a quick shower (although with no hair, all my showers are quick these days), and go down to the Cancer Center for my lovely Neulasta shot.

The foggy headedness is quickly setting in. I feel myself slipping into the depths of chemo hell. But I take comfort in the fact that I only have ONE more Red Devil cocktail to go. We'll worry about the Taxol in a few weeks. Soon enough I'll be back on top...for good!

Comments

  1. You've been through so much that exhaustion was due or overdue to set in. Relax and sleep when you can. Matt and everyone else is there to take care of you and the girls. Matt is due for some pampering when this is all over. You certainly married a gem. Only one more Red Devil to go and you're half way there with chemo. Hopefully Taxol won't be as bad but worry about that later. This will soon be over and a distant memory. Love Mama

    ReplyDelete
  2. Love you. A few more days and you'll be feeling better. And we're on for Scrabble tonight. xo.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Love love love the pic of you all walking hand in hand!!!

    ~Jackie

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Beauty in Life and Death

This is Matt unfortunately Melissa did not get finish her last entry so I will take it from here.  I will try not to have any typos or grammatical errors.  Melissa would really not like that, but she was my official proof reader for all important documents. Melissa and I always strived to look for beauty even in the darkest of times.  It is not always easy but it is always there when you look hard enough.  Our situation the last year and half have not been ideal there were lots of tears and dark times, but the beauty was overwhelming. Whether it was a note, meal, flowers, or text a a low point or just the love we felt from family or friends.  The beauty was there.  We had so many people praying for us and for Melissa to beat cancer once and for all, but I also prayed that Melissa would be pain free and if it was God's will that she passed peacefully.  Melissa was in so much pain last year.  She did not let her slow her down but she was hurting.  She packed more into a year with

Sigourney Weaver

Years ago (okay, fine...decades ago) in high school some boy jokingly called me Sigourney Weaver. I don't remember all of the details of how or why that nickname came about, but it's sort of funny that she and I do have a lot in common now. Well, the Sigourney Weaver of 1997 or whenever "Aliens" came out. Bald, badass, and with an alien growing inside of us!! My alien will be removed tomorrow morning though, Thank GOD! I'm SO over having this gross bump that hurts more and more every day. The other day I couldn't even put my jeans on without it pinching my little alien baby. It turns out I'm developing a "day before surgery" routine. I go shopping. Today it was the first ever "Back to School" shopping for Reagan! She starts Kindergarten next month, so I figured we should get her some new clothes before the full effects of radiation kick in and I'm too tired. (Wait.... I don't think anything will ever make me "too tired&qu

It's Baaaaaaccccckkkkk.......

6 years.... that's how long it's been since I finished with active treatment. However, I took Tamoxifen for 5 years to squash any estrogen left in my body. I recently switched over to a "tougher" aromatase inhibitor call arimidex. These drugs provided comfort and faith that I was doing everything in my power to prevent a recurrence. Guess what?! They failed me. Big time. It's back, and it's back all over. After months of hip pain that my NP chalked up repeatedly to muscle pain, she finally sent me to an orthopedist. He took X-rays and did NOT like what he saw. Additional blood work and bone scans have led to the diagnosis of cancer pretty much throughout my skeletal system. Metastases were found in the skull, scapula, multiple ribs, pelvis, both hips, and spine. Definitely NOT the news I was expecting nor wanting to hear. After an afternoon of crying and occasionally feeling like I was going to throw up, Matt and I met with Dr. Adler, my oncologist. He was